Friday, August 31, 2007

How I felt about a month after Logan was born...

First email I sent to a parent with a child with down syndrome...first time I was brave enough to reach out...

Sent on June 24th, 2007
Logan was born on Mother's Day last month and is doing really well.
It was a complete surprise at birth that Logan had Down syndrome, so we had a very hard couple of weeks in the beginning. After the shock was over the next thing was the bonding process, which was really hard because I constantly compared how I was feeling to how I felt when my first son was born. I wanted so badly to feel the same way because it had been such a wonderful experience, but this time was just much different. It took longer to bond, but at this point I feel like we have come a long way and we love him so much, I can't imagine life without him.
The first couple of weeks I didn't want anyone telling me about Logan's condition and I didn't seek out any information. At that time I didn't think I would ever want to know because when I looked into the future I felt so overwhelmed and scared. (I still do) But eventually I started to read some info and I felt more and more comfortable talking to doctors and therapists.
I am doing pretty good right now because I have learned to live in the moment and take one day at a time. I feel less overwhelmed and I feel like I have had the time to adjust our future in my mind. It was hard to let go of how I had pictured our family's future to be before Logan arrived.
My husband is doing surprisingly well. He was very sad at first, but he quickly just made up his mind that we were going to love Logan and get on with our life as a family. He is very optimistic...more than me...I tend to be more realistic. I fear that Dale (my husband) may be disappointed in the future and I don't want to set myself up for that. But lately it has been hard not to be optimistic because Logan is such a sweetheart and so strong and healthy, so we have really been having a lot of fun with him.
We are in the process of filling out the paperwork for Katie Beckett and we have started the Birth to 3 program. He has had 3 therapists and a teacher assigned to him and we will be meeting the therapists and setting up our plans and goals for Logan this week.
I feel like we have done all that we can and should do for now...

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I just visited your blog and it is great. I feel terribly computer illiterate, as I have no idea how to set up a blog. Maybe you could help me. I just wanted to let you know that everything is going to be okay. It can be a little overwhelming at times raising a special needs child--but there are many more rewards in store. It is really helpful for me to reach out to other parents who are going through the same things I am so I thank you for being so honest with your feelings..Jennifer Dornfeld, Mother of Maria (5-DS) and Allie (2-typical)Stevens Point